Appreciation vs. Gratitude
Did you know that appreciation and gratitude are not the same thing?
I recently picked up a book from the library called Conscious Luck: Eight Secrets to Intentionally Change Your Fortune, and this excerpt gave me a fresh perspective on the distinction between appreciation and gratitude.
Many people use the terms appreciation and gratitude interchangeably. Although they are closely connected; They are not the same thing.
Gratitude is something you feel.
Appreciation is something you do.
Gratitude is feeling thankful for the people, places and events in your life, including your health, your relationships, your possessions, your accomplishments, and all the positive things that happen to you.
Appreciation is active and a bit more complex.
When we stand in front of a Rembrandt or watch the play of moonlight on water, we appreciate the beauty. When we notice that a friend has gone out of their way to be helpful or kind, we appreciate their loving nature. When we savor a fabulous wine or a delicious meal, we appreciate the flavors we experience. These are internal acts of increased attention and awareness. To appreciate, you focus on an object deeply and perceive its qualities.
If gratitude is something you struggle with, we suggest starting with the internal process of appreciating people, places or objects because the act of appreciating is a gateway to feeling grateful, and appreciation is something you can practice at any moment!
To deepen the appreciation process, pay close attention to the physical aspect of your experience.
Right now, look around and find something to appreciate. Say the color of the sky.
Then notice your body sensations as you appreciate it.
You’ll likely feel a sense of expansion because the first thing appreciation does is open the body.
Your breath is fuller and you perceive more.
Colors are brighter and all your senses are more acute because you are giving attention to them.
Noticing your breath and your body sensations develops your appreciation receptors, heightening your ability to appreciate, which naturally expands your ability to experience gratitude. Over time gratitude grows as a result of your repeated practice of appreciation.
Bringing this back to my own experience: When I lived in Japan in my 20’s, I followed the cultural cues and paid deep attention to all the new experiences I was being presented with — from each morsel of food I put in my mouth, to the strong sips of matcha sourced from the neighboring tea fields, and the sturdy yet delicate composition of all the beautiful flowers blooming from one season to the next.
This began what has become a lifelong practice of paying close attention to the sensations of my own experience in order to gain a sense of appreciation for any and everything.
I’ve long considered myself the kind of person who naturally feels gratitude, and I attribute the immense gratitude I feel as foundational to the quality of my life. But it wasn’t until reading this passage from Conscious Luck that I realized my ability to feel a deep sense of gratitude was most certainly cultivated when I learned to pay astute attention and appreciate all things big and small that crossed my path in Japan.
Which gives me yet another reason to be grateful for Naoko and her family for welcoming me with open arms!
How lucky I am to have met them!
PS. As luck would have it, today March 17 (St. Patrick’s Day) is also Naoko’s birthday. Happy birthday, Naoko! I love you.
